A Couples’ Journey: Going With The Flow

By Larry and Carol Smith – Posted February 9, 2017

Carol and I sat at the kitchen table and talked while we finished breakfast. It was already after 10 am and through our spacious windows the morning sun gave everything outside a beautiful glow.

She took a big sip of her coffee and turned away from the window and toward me. “What have you got planned for us for today?”

“Well,” I said through a sleepy yawn. “Since it is Saturday, and we slept so late, I really don’t know. But it’s such a beautiful day, so let’s take a short road trip to…somewhere.”

Carol smiled enthusiastically. “Yay, road trip! Where is somewhere?”

“I don’t know,” I said. “But why don’t you start getting ready, and I’ll try to find somewhere close we haven’t been yet.”

She left the room, and I turned on the laptop and started googling for hiking trails and parks in our area. Within a couple of hours we were on our way with cameras and a picnic lunch in the back seat.

In another hour, we arrived at a little park somewhere out in the woods. It was early afternoon, and the sun was still high. With cameras around our necks, we headed off down one of the hiking trails.

The scenery on the trail was beautiful. We snapped pictures as we walked and commented to each other how magnificent God’s creation was.  After taking pics for a while, Carol lowered her camera and sighed: “Just too bad though that you can’t really capture it with a photo. There really isn’t anything that stands out.”

As pretty as it was, the scenery was very broad and expansive, and we were both having trouble framing our shots.  We wondered if we were actually getting any pictures that would look beautiful to others. “Nope, can’t do it justice at all,” I said. “But let’s just snap what looks good, and see what we end up with.”

Later on that day, back at home, we were disappointed to find no photos at all that we felt were good enough for our blog or to post on Facebook.  “We should have either gotten there earlier in the day or later in the afternoon,” I remarked. “Then the light would have been more interesting, and that would have given us some good pics.”

A week later we again found ourselves planning a road trip. This time it was an overnight trip. We talked about where we could go that wouldn’t be too expensive. We asked ourselves: “Where can we go to get some good photos to post online?” There really weren’t any places close by that we hadn’t already been to several times and taken hundreds of photos of.

As we talked it became apparent to me that the subject of photography was more dominant than any other discussion about our proposed trip. The question came to mind: “What was our real motive for taking the road trips?” It was an eye-opening realization. Were we just doing it so we could get great photos to post online in hopes that people would pay attention to them and like them?

We didn’t want to think that we had a selfish motive. It certainly didn’t start that way. In the beginning, we were just having fun exploring our life as a couple and taking pictures. We started posting our pics on Facebook, and after doing that for a while, we felt that there was more to share with others than just the pictures about how God was doing so many wonderful things in our lives. And that is how the blog began.

Realizing how much importance we placed on whether or not people liked and responded to our photos made us see a new side of ourselves. Were we becoming too prideful about what we posted on Facebook and in the blog? Were we trying to use photography and fancy words to make people think we were something that we really were not? Had we lost our sense of humility?

Carol and I had read and discussed bible passages about humility many times. Philippians 2:3-5 came to mind: “Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus.”

It was quite a revelation that there might be selfish motives for our photos and blog. We started out documenting our love and what God was doing in our lives and now our main purpose seemed to be getting good photos in order to impress others. Our motives had evolved, changing away from our original purpose almost without us realizing it.  I realized the truth of Jeremiah 17:9: “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?”

Continuing to ponder this new realization, we were thankful for the revealing of true motives and for the way God was working in our hearts.  As promised to believers, he was showing us to us our true motives, giving us a new heart and spirit, softening us and moving us to do what is right (Ezekiel 36:26-27).

We booked a room for two nights at a nearby lodge and headed out for an early fall outing. “Let’s just go relax and enjoy the woods,” I said. “And we won’t even worry about taking pictures at all.”

It was late afternoon by the time we arrived and got checked into the lodge. Carol stood outside on the balcony admiring the beautiful reflections of the trees along the river bank in the glistening water. “How about a walk?” she said. “Sure is pretty out there.”

I nodded and put on my jacket.  “Are we taking cameras?” Carol asked.

“Sure,” I said picking up my camera. “But let’s just walk for the fun and relaxation of it and not worry about getting good pictures or any at all.”

Carol grabbed my hand, and we made our way to the nearby trail head. “We’ll just walk and see where God takes us,” she said. “He’s got a lesson for us out there, and maybe we can discover it.”

Walking that day somehow felt different than the last few walks. Though we had no definite purpose other than the walk itself, there was a feeling of adventure.

A slight breeze was circulating, making the air pleasantly cool. I breathed deeply and let the fresh, clean air fill expand my chest. The feeling reminded me of Genesis 2:7 and the time when God breathed life into the first man, and the man became a living being. I thought about my life and the miracle of being alive. I was out here in the woods with Carol, a very much alive person, and surrounded by a myriad of living things, plants and animals and insects. Every speck of life was infinitely beautiful and unique and mysteriously beyond human comprehension. There had to be a creator. Such detailed, perfectly functional diversity could not possibly be an accident.

As I thought about it, my awareness of life somehow changed. God’s presence, His breath, could not be separated from any living thing. My definition of the character of nature took on a new dimension. Everything on the trail that day had a different, new, identity and meaning than what I, in my limited understanding, had previously given it.

I had been looking at the things in nature as objects to be judged and evaluated for worthiness to be paid attention to and photographed. Now I was realizing that is not at all what nature was.  I cried out to God, asking Him to let me see things as they really were.

Carol must have also been experiencing powerful thoughts and feelings. Usually we kept up with each other on the trail and walked pretty much side by side, often holding hands.  But on this day she stayed at distance, either ahead or behind, and seemed quieter than usual. “Just looking for God,” she said softly when I asked about her quietness.

The woods were pretty but, staying true to what we decided, neither of us was taking many pictures. After all, we had taken pictures on this trail many times, in all seasons, and there really wasn’t anything new to capture.

Yet there was still something, somewhere in the back of my mind, that made me feel as if I should be taking pics. It felt a little like an addiction or nervous habit was gnawing at me. The revelation of God’s presence in nature that I had experienced at the beginning of the walk began to fade as I struggled to resist the urge to keep myself busy by taking snapshots. As our walk progressed, it became difficult for me to not think about the camera and taking pictures.

To be honest, for a long time I hadn’t really been able to experience peace and serenity out in the woods like I used to when I was younger.  Lately I only found genuine peace in the woods in occasional glimpses that God granted me of His presence.

As we walked, and I continued to resist the urge to snap pictures, my thoughts drifted farther and farther away from nature, and a thousand other thoughts and concerns flooded my mind. I found myself just wishing the hike would end soon.

Carol serenely continued along the trail ahead of me. She appeared to be feeling very peaceful. She was focusing on little things, and I stopped to wait as she knelt down to take a close look at a tiny wildflower.

That day, my perception obviously wasn’t as sensitive as Carol’s. She was seeing beauty in things I kept overlooking; she saw God and stopped to be in His presence when I just kept walking. Disappointed in myself for thinking so negatively, I tried to clear my mind and just think of God.

In the silence of our setting, it came to me that I was programmed by the world to look for power and strength and even divinity in the dramatic. I thought of Elijah and how the Lord commanded him to stand on the mount and wait for Him (1 Kings 19:11-13 AMP). He stood there waiting and experienced incredible drama. A strong wind broke pieces of rock off the mountain; there was an earthquake and finally a fire, but none of these big and scary events contained the Lord’s presence. It was in the gentle stillness that followed that Elijah heard God speaking to him in a still, small voice.

We slowed down at a junction in the trail and decided to head off to the right and take a short walk to the place where park rangers left food for the deer. After walking a few minutes we found ourselves at the edge of a small, grassy meadow.

Sure enough, on the other side, partially hidden in the shadows of the trees, a young deer stood quietly watching. We quietly made our way to a fallen log and sat down to watch.

A few minutes passed by, and the deer barely moved at all. “I’m going to try to take a picture,” I said, feeling a pang of guilt because of my struggle not to make taking photos the emphasis.

I switched my camera lens over to a zoom and slowly stood up from my seat on the log. Aiming the viewfinder, and zooming all the way, I took a couple of snapshots of the deer grazing at the edge of the woods. Quietly, I edged a few more steps closer and took a couple more pics.

The deer stopped eating and looked in my direction. Though worried that I might scare him away, I took a few more steps. But he didn’t seem concerned and resumed eating. I continued with more steps toward the deer, snapping pictures as I got closer.

To my surprise, the deer began walking toward me. He walked out of the clearing, into full view, and stood there as if posing. I moved even closer toward him, and he just looked at me and never moved or acted scared.

Not wanting to invade his space any longer, I stopped advancing and lowered my camera. I felt appreciative that the deer had given me the opportunity to get as close as I did.  We had spotted many deer in that same woods, in the past, and they always got spooked and ran away before we got that close.

I returned to the log, and Carol, knowing that I had received a blessing. We sat there for a while longer, holding hands and observing.

Deciding that the deer deserved complete privacy, we quietly walked across the meadow and into the woods on the other side. The beautiful creature stood still and watched as we passed by.

“God is teaching me so much,” I thought to myself. For most of my years I had been trying to control life, and in doing so I had let it control me. How much more beautiful and wonderful it was to try to walk in God’s will and just let life unfold into the freedom that results.

We made our way down a steep hill in the direction of the lake. The sun was beginning to go down and intense beams of light were flooding through the forest. The trees became silhouettes, and the shadows came to life and danced in the little breeze that whispered through the woods. The light from the setting sun displayed every possible shade of red, orange and yellow and poured through the forest like liquid jewels. It was intensely beautiful and moving. And there was an incredible silence at the same time; not a sound anywhere.

There was just no way to describe it in words. Carol and I both took a few pictures, never for a moment thinking we could capture it. We stood there for a long time in awe, believing that we must be in the very presence of God.

We sensed that today’s walk was at an end. There was nowhere further to go and nothing else to do. The hike seemed to have taken on a life of its own, and we just stepped onto the trail and went along for the ride. Nature itself, growing and moving spontaneously, was teaching us to put our trust in God and then go with the flow of His will.

Yes, we do have to make good choices and then take action to follow them. Yes, we do have to make an effort to do what is right and pleasing to God. But once we know where we are headed, we can relax and let Him lead. The final destination is to be in His presence. The final outcome is to accomplish His will. But the specific route that we may take, and what we will encounter on the journey, are best left up to God.

Carol and I knew that we didn’t need to look for places and things that made good photographs. We simply had to let our love for God and each other lead us to the next adventure. That is our testimony. Put Him first, follow Him and give everything over to Him in complete trust. Everything else will fall into place.

Note From Carol: The time Larry and I spend together is the most treasured moments of my life. I thank my Heavenly Father for giving me such a loving husband that does his best to hear the heart of God at all times.  The way we have learned to allow God’s love to flow through and around us these last few months has been amazing!  I know that our life together is a testimony of how perfect love heals all wounds.  First Corinthians says it best when describing what love is. When I read chapter 13 it reminds me of the qualities that I believe Larry and I strive for in our marriage. We sincerely hope that the stories we share in our blogs reflect the love that we have for God and each other. Thank you for reading and God bless.

“But ask the beasts, and they will teach you; the birds of the heavens, and they will tell you; or the bushes of the earth, and they will teach you; and the fish of the sea will declare to you. Who among all these does not know that the hand of the Lord has done this? (Job 12:7-9 ESV)”

© 2017 by Larry and Carol Smith